Thursday, April 23, 2009

Pool Standings: How Do You Solve A Problem Like Matt Giraud?

Do I have any idea what to do about Matt Giraud? I sure don't! But while I figure it out, let's figure out the scores for this week, when both Anoop and Lil left in 7th place.

Almost everyone thought Lil was ging to go all the way, at least to the top 4; the Weetapidol Hive Mind had her in 3rd place. Which means big points for Shari, who predicted her leaving in 8th place. Kim had her in 5th, which was not bad, all things considered; in fact, she moves into first place this week. But Shari was the big winner vis a vis Ley-ull--good enough to push her into second place from her previous 5th place position.

Anoop, on the other hand, was predicted by the Hive Mind to go out at 8th, and we had him a little bit all over the place. Shmuel and Mo Pie (yay! go me!) had him correctly placed at 7th, so were the big points winners there. Runners up were the Hive Mind, TeKay, and Kelly S. Overall standings are all shook up! And they are:

89 points: Kim
88 points: Weetapidol Hive Mind, Shari H.
87 points: Mo Pie, TeKay, Kelly S.
86 points: Aine
85 points: Wendi
82 points: Jeremy, Gila
81 points: Eden, Shmuel
80 points: Martha
59 points: Weetabix
56 points: Julie

According to the Hive Mind, our fifth place contestant is... Allison! Could we be on the money? We'll see!

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Top 7 Part Two: Talkin' Bout Crazy Cool Medallions

Pie: hi!
Weetabix: hola!
Pie: am home... eating Jello
Weetabix: yum!
Pie: Idol is on in 18!
Weetabix: whoo!
Pie: did you tape it?
Weetabix: yes, I taped it. Twice.
Pie: hee. excellent.
Ian is currently playing warmup disco tunes… "Shame" by Evelyn Champagne King
Weetabix: woo! I am not warming up… I am warmed
Pie: I just turned on the TV and there was some kind of intro montage… Ryan in front of flames
Weetabix: that was an excellent beginning. Ryan should stand in front of the earth's elements every week.
Very "Earth Wind and Fire"-ish, ala Disco week!
Pie: the light-up steps are crazy
Weetabix: Is Kid Rock in the audience tonight?
Pie: dear god, I hope so
Weetabix: I swear I saw him
Pie: the judges! they all look semi-normal.
Weetabix: yes! It's casual Friday on AI
Pie: not for Adam Lambert, he seems to be in black tie
Weetabix: Allison is all levels of sparkly tonight

"I'm Every Woman"

Weetabix: Interesting, we didn't get any intro videos about Lil, as per usual
Pie: maybe they decided to cut those, rather than the judges’ comments
Weetabix: Lil is not trying to fool anyone with the wigs, man. One week she's got a cropped bob, the next week, she's all Farrah Fawcett hair
Pie: Lil is not doing a whole lot of "singing" in this song
she is saying "come on" and the background singers are doing the heavy lifting thus far
Ian says, "She's not gonna win."
Weetabix: Vegas odds agree with Ian
Pie: she's got a hot body in that jumpsuit, though.
Weetabix: As they have Lil with the highest odds to win
or the lowest odds?
There are some odds.
Pie: I think lowest odds is how you would put that… maybe
Weetabix: Snowball's chance in hell odds
Pie: I agree with Randy that it did not show her artistry, even though it was fun
Weetabix: Randy didn't feel it, dawg, and I agree with him
Oooh, Kara doesn't think she was worth the wait. Ouch!
Pie: Wow, painful!
Kara's shirt is backless. I find that fascinating.
Paula is, as usual, grading on a curve
the judges have all picked up the "you need to define yourself as an artist" meme
Weetabix: how exactly does one do that? I mean, Adam has done it well.
Pie: it's the karaoke thing that is bothering the judges.
Weetabix: Meanwhile, I think Lil knows that she's done.
Pie: she's done tomorrow night, I think. ouch! and so does Simon.
Weetabix: Which song do you think Lil should have done? Aside from ABBA?
Pie: I think she's a disappointment in general... not necessarily that song choice was the issue.
“The Rose” is a great song and the arrangement was great. and she wasn't that good. that's where she lost me.
Weetabix: Yes, she's one of the classic Idol contestants that start so amazingly and then... pluh. That's the fizzle out sound. Pluh.
Pie: not fssssssssssss?
Weetabix: it's a little wetter
8:13 PMPie: that's kind of gross
Weetabix: failure is not pretty

"She Works Hard For The Money"

Weetabix: I love that he's doing Donna Summer
"I picked it because she works hard. She works hard for the money."
Pie: hee. Kris is kind of cute.
Weetabix: your weakness is showing again
Pie: guitar and bongos!
Weetabix: ooh, I kind of like this arrangement
Pie: me too! this is kind of awesome!
Weetabix: I think Castrochuleta is safe, quite honestly. Has he ever been bottom 3?
Pie: Ian says: "boring. BORING."
Weetabix: I'm still struck by the resemblance to Jason Mraz
Pie: he is the guy who chose "Falling Slowly." I cannot hate on him.
Weetabix: That's true. I did really like that song last week. Castrochuleta is growing on me.
Pie: this is groovy! I will be sad if he goes tomorrow night
Weetabix: Who knew?! Jason Castro is probably kicking himself right now, at his apartment in obscurity.
Pie: Jason Castro just got a record deal!
Weetabix: There isn't a god.
Pie: no! he is a friend of a friend. he is apparently a sweetheart. I have to be pro-Jason Castro
Weetabix: I do not, since a friend of a friend of a friend carries no such obligation.
Pie: Kara liked the arrangement, as did I!
Weetabix: Oh, the boy in Kris' friends and family should know better than to wear horizontal stripes.
Pie: "a classy Santana feel"! and he "shops in the women's department"! never change, Paula.
Weetabix: Wow, Paula totally is totally sane and awesome.
Pie: did you type that before she broke out the department store metaphor?
Weetabix: That was a decent analysis. Actually, I thought that was a clever turn of phrase, but then she ruined the guise of sanity by repeating it five times.
Pie: Simon is correct in saying it was original, not karaoke… and I agree the gender-bending song choice is great
I love how they're all "WE DO NOT CARE IF YOU ARE WEARING A THONG"
Weetabix: Actually, I believe that I've said this before on here, but anytime a guy sings a woman's song and doesn't change the gender makes me happy.
Pie: I believe we've had this discussion about "Jolene" by the White Stripes
Weetabix: yes, that's exactly what I'm referring to

Weetabix: I am paused on Ryan leaning on a balcony railing, looking very much like a preacher, or maybe Kate Winslet in Titanic
Don't let go, Ryan!
Pie: Never let go! Ryan! Ryan! Ryan! Ryan! Ryan! Ryan!


Weetabix: remember the guy at The Mint who sang this song and it was the most amazing performance ever?
Pie: vaguely!
Weetabix: Well, not as good as the guy who did Be Our Guest from Beauty and the Beast, but still, amazing
Pie: no, the Be Our Guest guy was the BEST
Weetabix: Well, right now, Danny's is not as good as the guy from The Mint
who I will now refer to as The Samoan, even though I don't know that he was from Samoa
Pie: Danny is not that original either, now that I think of it… he has the same karaoke problem as Ley-ull
Weetabix: I am still charmed by Mr. Gokey, but I will concede that it might be his glasses.
and the Ted Mosby-ness of Gokey
Pie: he's like the love child of Ted Mosby and the Captain
Weetabix: Oh, he kind of is!
I wonder if I could talk the Captain into those glasses
Pie: Danny is energetic and can sing, but he doesn't do it for me.
Weetabix: he just fucked up the lyrics
They just showed him in the audience!
Pie: Ian says he saw Pamela Anderson
Weetabix: That was more exciting than Danny's performance for me.
she was sitting next to Kid Rock, which was interesting, because I thought they had broken up.
Pie: well Randy was feelin' it, dawg
Weetabix: Kara called him an incredible vocalist and said his pitch is "right on"
Pie: Paula is talking about range.... Paula! so coherent!
and wants to jump him
Weetabix: well, who else does she have in the competition? Anoop?
certainly not "Matt" who is just skeevy for some reason, despite the comparisons to Timberlake
Pie: I agree with Simon that the performance was slightly awkward, but only slightly
I don't see him in the finals, though

"Hot Stuff"

Weetabix: Allison is on red stairs. Is that a metaphor?
By the way, her outfit?! FUCKING AWESOME
Pie: Ian would like to know what she is wearing. I think "awesomeness" is the correct answer.
she is swathed in awesomeness.
Weetabix: The shoes and the boots are amazing, but all the leather? It's like Stella from Project Runway's wet dream
Pie: the jacket I love. the sequins I love.
I see her in the finals. I have been seeing her in the finals for a couple of weeks.
Weetabix: also, I love the illusion. If you wanted to camouflage a soft tummy, it's hidden in the matte leather, and who is going to notice it with all that sequin action around the ass and boobs?
I feel weird referring to a 16 year old's boobs
Pie: that was a little weird, but I enjoyed it. like her outfit.
Weetabix: I agree, I thinks she's going to be in the top four
Pie: I agree that the arrangement wasn't so awesome, but the performance was good. completely agree with Kara and Randy.
Paula made another sentence! Paula! sentences!
Weetabix: This is a strange new world.
Pie: Adam is coming up... did they give "Matt" the pimp spot?
Weetabix: I kind of love that she just weirdly body checked Ryan
oh, that will be sad
Matt does not deserve pimping

“If I Can’t Have You”

Weetabix: Adam's looking sharp!
Pie: he looks fancier than Ryan!
Weetabix: Ryan needs to have the bar raised
Pie: "If I Can't Have You"
Weetabix: Sweet
Pie: I enjoy this song!
Weetabix: although not your hoped "It's Raining Men"
Pie: that was a dream.
Weetabix: I want someone to do the theme song from the Talking It Up Barry Gibb Talk show
Pie: hee. "talkin' about.. crazy cool medallions! talkin' it up!"
Weetabix: Oh, he's awesome
Pie: he is smart... this is the exact opposite of what he did last week.
Weetabix: I'm getting a Wicked vibe right now
this was wicked clever! Seriously, turning this into a ballad? Brilliant.
Paula's all tingly.
Pie: Adam is so fucking fantastic.
Ian says it is not his favorite "Mister Lamberrr" performance.
Weetabix: that was the awesome… what was Ian's favorite?
Pie: the one he didn't see... "Mad World"
Weetabix: Well, it wasn't my favorite either, actually, but it was probably my second favorite.
yes, “Mad World” was my favorite.
Pie: Paula looks like she's just dissolving into a pile of emotion.
while Kara is telling Adam he is awesome
Paula likes his vulnerability and calls him fascinating and brilliant and awesome. MORE! SENTENCES!
Weetabix: Simon looked like he was going to puke during Paula's commentary
Pie: Simon loved the originality and memorability of it and the "immaculate" vocals
slam dunk again, Mister Lamberrrr!
Weetabix: Ryan just used "melting into a pool"! Shout out!
Pie: totes!

Matt "MATT" Giraud
"Staying Alive"

Pie: someday, we need to be in this audience
Weetabix: Someday, maybe that will happen, but how would we live blog?
Pie: okay, so I feel really guilty for calling him one of the generic white guys, because it turns out Matt is biracial! who knew!?
Weetabix: he is?! what are the races?
Pie: I gather he is half black
Weetabix: interesting. Well, he doesn't "read" black to America, despite whether he is or not
Pie: this is kind of tragic
Weetabix: this is seriously awkward… and stanks of "should have gone home last week"
Pie: Ian's comment on this is "oh god."
oh, they just showed his family! that black woman might be his mom… she looks super young though
Randy "that sucked, but you can sing."
Weetabix: Kara "You sang something different than Adam!"
Pie: the judges have to say good things otherwise they look really stupid for saving him.
Weetabix: that's a good point, they can't really say he sucks. Hopefully Simon will be the voice of reason. And he is.
Pie: yes. thank you, Simon.
Matt" should be out, but god knows what will happen

"Dim All The Lights"

Pie: and Anoop with the pimp spot!
Weetabix: oh, that's right, Anoop. Anoop has the pimp spot.
I had forgotten about Anoop. What does THAT say?
I even referenced him earlier.
Pie: it says you do not care for Anoop
Weetabix: I like the streamlined version without the montage before performance
Pie: this is quite an outfit
Ian says "do they know what 'disco' means??"
Weetabix: It's very 80's prom
Pie: now it is getting boogielicious
Weetabix: and yet... not
Anoop is quite handsome. I just don't like his voice that much.
Pie: milquetoastilicious
Weetabix: like that last note... it was not good
Pie: Randy concurs
Weetabix: as Randy mentioned
Pie: Kara also really liked it… Paula also wants to jump him
Weetabix: well, I agree that I enjoy his pink sweater. Real men DO wear pink! Boys, are you listening?
I don't know that we have any male readers. Wait, Shmuel reads. As does Joe in Las Vegas.
Pie: and they are both going to put on pink tomorrow, I bet
I kind of disagree with Simon for once... I don't think that was awful.

Pie: I think they were so mean to Lil that it means she's safe
Weetabix: perhaps
Pie: Kris was really good but went second, which might hurt him
I think he's safe too though
Weetabix: I think Lil is still going to pull some votes, and I think the Castrochuleta should be safe
Pie: I would like to think Danny is in danger, but probably not
I hope Allison is safe
Weetabix: In retrospect, I liked Danny's more than "Matt" and Anoop, Lil and Allison
Basically, everyone but Adam
Pie: Adam was fantastic and if he is out I will stop watching!
Matt is, I think, in danger, in spite of last week
and Anoop had the pimp spot so I doubt he will go! where does that leave me?!
Weetabix: I think Matt and Anoop are done
despite the power of the pimp
Two people are gone! That's just so amazing!
Pie: I think Matt and someone good, like Kris or Allison or Danny.
Weetabix: Oooh, that would sting.
Let's check the preliminaries at Dial Idol
Pie: wow, way too close to call, I think
Weetabix: everything's so close
Pie: although Allison is at the bottom
Weetabix: but you're right: Allison, Matt and Kris are bottom three right now
Pie: woo! I'm good. heh.
Weetabix: With Anoop a close four
Well, there's still time, too, as it just finished airing in CA
Pie: if Allison goes, that would really suck. one girl left, and it's Lil??
talk about the save backfiring.
Weetabix: yes, that would really suck, but as you mentioned, it's White Guy season, despite "Matt"'s "bi-racial"ness
Pie: sigh. well, I guess we'll see! it will be a surprising elimination if it isn't some combination of "Matt"/Anoop/Lil
Weetabix: We shall see!
Pie: I am worried for Allison!
Weetabix: America will have done something! I can't believe they wasted the save on "Matt" for that
Pie: okay, I have no further comments. the prosecution rests.
Weetabix: Weetapidol out?
Pie: Weetapidol... out!

Thursday, April 16, 2009

Top 7: the plague of stupid Bryan Adams songs

(Disclaimer: once again, Weet's Tifaux has given Weetapidol the shaft and chose not to record American Idol, so Weet is relying upon the grace of for the performance videos. The TiFaux has been double-checked for next week, and we are also using an 8-year-old but much more reliable actual Tivo as a failsafe. You probably don't care about that, but there it is.)

Pie :
I was so excited about the "songs from the movies" theme tonight
but then I read song spoilers
Weetabix : yeah, I did too
Pie : I laughed my ass off when I saw the last one
TWO Bryan Adams songs? SNORE.
I mean if Quentin Tarantino's there, someone do Son of a Preacher Man, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD.
Weetabix : I hadn't noticed the prevalence of the Bryan Adams. He must have been easy to give up licensing?
Pie : or Bang Bang My Baby Shot Me Down
Weetabix : Lil could have done Son of a Preacher Man up righteous
Pie : okay, I am watching the intro... I will report again... it is an intro with lighting, and Ryan just did "THIS is... Quentin Tarantino." and then QT said "this! is American Idol."
Weetabix : ha! I miss having the real show. Stupid TiFaux.
Pie : you should fix that, woman!
Weetabix : no kidding! It didn't record the Office either
but at least I can watch The Office online for free
AI, however, seems to be on lockdown
Pie : yeah, good point. The Office last week was good.
Weetabix : that seems downright unAmerrrrican
Pie : Randy is wearing stripes
Weetabix : and the sky is blue
Pie : Kara has flat hair
Weetabix : intriguing
Pie : paula is wearing sparkles
and Simon's hair is flat
Weetabix : flatter than normal?
Pie : but flat on top, not flat ironed like Kara's
no, he is nondescript
Simon is apologizing for the overrun last week
Weetabix : as well he should
Pie : and this week, only two judges will be talking for each contestant
Weetabix : did he explain the reason (RYAN RAPS)?
Pie : he claimed it was because Kara and Paula babbled too much
Weetabix : misogynist
Pie : totes
now they are doing a Quentin Tarantino montage
Weetabix : I enjoy Tarantino, even though he basically makes the same movie over and over
Pie : it is an amusing montage that I suspect QT did himself
Pulp Fiction is a masterpiece
Weetabix : true dat
Pie : and let me say for the ten thousandth time that it losing best picture to Forrest Gump WAS A TRAVESTY
Weetabix : I saw it three times while it was still in the movie theatre. I don't recall doing that with any other movie as an adult.
Pie : I love that QT is such a huge Idol fan... this is the second time he's been a judge, even
Weetabix : he's a judge too?
Pie : wait, no.. just a mentor

"I Don't Want To Miss A Thing" from Armageddon
sappy vballad #1

Weetabix : They've started a new site: vote for the to offset the supposed death curse of going first
Pie : I have nothing to say about this performance thus far
Weetabix : I will say this: I don't think she chose the right song
Pie : yeah, I don't think so either. this song is boring and her performance is boring me, and there's something weird with her lower register... like the song is too low for her.
Weetabix : I don't really like much of anything involved with "Armageddon", aside from (speaking of Tarantino), Steve Buscemi
but this song is just not working with her voice at all
Pie : no
Weetabix : also, her outfit was not adorable
Pie : I have been rooting for Allison, but this week, not so much
Weetabix : last week, she was adorable, this week, it was boxy or something
Pie : okay, judges! let's see who gets to talk...
Weetabix : I still like her, as an individual, and I think she's cute and stuff, but the song was not so much
Pie : Paula said she has "special sauce" and is authentic
Weetabix : like a Big Mac?
Pie : Simon said it was "barbeque sauce" and hot and spicy.
Weetabix : interesting
Pie : "you are the girls' only hope left in this competition"
Weetabix : I thought he'd barbecue skewer her, but apparently not?
Pie : she is improving
Weetabix : wow, ouch to Lil Rounds
Pie : and "Ley-ull sucks" was the subtext there.
Simon thinks she has a chance to win
so there you go, they liked her
maybe I just don't like this song

"Everything I do" from Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves

Pie : is next with some bullshit Bryan Adams song from "Robin Hood"
Weetabix : far away, blue stage, AI logo in the front
Pie : "Everything I Do I Do For You"
QT was "concerned" by the song choice
Weetabix : as is the world
Pie : this song sucks as badly as Kevin Costner's accent in that movie.
Weetabix : he didn't have one. I think he just gave up and was "American Rob Hood"
Pie : at least Anoop is changing it up a little
their cheesy ass song choices are VERY DISAPPOINING
Weetabix : I was hoping Anoop would be wearing some kind of peasant garb
Pie : that would be glorious
Weetabix : and tights
Pie : and holding a quiver of arrows
and tights, of course!
Weetabix : a quiver could be the new Wallet Chain!
Pie : this is a fine performance but what an awful song
Weetabix : but no, instead we got a Thomas Pink shirt and a bad tie, along with a weird sleeveless jacket situation
Pie : I didn't notice, because the song put me to sleep
Weetabix : yeah, Anoop may have shot his foot with his crossbow in this one
Pie : Randy thinks he's "found his zone" and is "rocking the house"
Kara says his place is "pop songs and adding your soul to it"
Weetabix : Are the judges messing with me? Or are these songwriters in the audience right now?
Pie : and it was one of his best vocals
it was a good vocal, I just loathe the song.
songwriters in the audience?
Weetabix : like, maybe they don't want to offend them by saying how much it sucked?

"Born to be Wild" from Easy Rider

Weetabix : I suspect this will be an aural orgasm
Pie : QT thinks Adam is "the real deal"
Adam is up, the crowd goes wild! I have to say I enjoy Adam's gloves, and also his showmanship of doing that "touch the hands of the screaming girls" thing
Weetabix : I am interested in the fact that QT enjoyed the taste. Silhouette of adam in front of lightening bolts
Pie : the lightning bolts say to me, from a stage design perspective, "fuck it, we're going with Adam"
Weetabix : agreed... they are trying to mesmerize America.
Pie : "we will not pretend he isn't the most interesting thing about this show.... we are aware he is."
he's also got a wallet chain for you
hee. he is so awesome.
Weetabix : although we thought that with Daughtry too. I keep pointing out Daughtry as the outlier to the whole theories of AI mechanizations
but seriously, the quality of his performance is totally rock star caliber. Everyone else just looks awkward and meek.
Pie : yeah but Daughtry should have won! he was supposed to win! that was an aberration!
Weetabix : Adam takes his balls and puts them against the wall. Or whatever that saying is.
Pie : yeah, he does. he puts his balls all over the place.
Weetabix : and then the falsetto! It's all shades of awesome.
Adam Lambert just teabagged America.
Pie : ha!
Paula says "WOO!!!!"
Weetabix : that's some kind of necklace that she's wearing tonight
Pie : and the audience says "WOO!!!"
I believe that is part of her dress
Weetabix : like a dog collar? or part of her dress?
Pie : Adam "dares to dance in the path of greatness" and is brave. Amen, Paula.
Weetabix : "fortune rewards the brave" and I agree, he's crazy brave
Pie : ha! Simon's funny. "you've gotta learn to express yourself more."
too Rocky Horror... you knew someone was going to go there eventually.
Weetabix : well, yeah. I was thinking that it could be called a little throw-back to 80s hair band
Pie : although if he had sung Sweet Transvestite for movie week, that would have ruuuuled
Weetabix : oh my god, I would have stroked out...or of those prepositions
Pie : and from this to more Bryan Adams
I am telling you right now, "Matt" is toast
also, I thought it was "fortune favors the bold"
but Paula was close!
Weetabix : oh, you're right, it is

Matt "Matt" Giraud
"Have You Really Ever Loved A Woman?" from Don Juan DeMarco

Pie : Ryan Raps with "Matt"
Weetabix : I can't believe we have to listen to "Matt" now....and it's the worst bryan adams song ever
Pie : what song?
Weetabix : "Have You Really Ever Loved A Woman"
Pie : oh god, vomit
Weetabix : from the worst Johnny Depp movie ever
Pie : Daughtry did this song. and even Daughtry put me to sleep.
Weetabix : that's right
I forgot about that
QT also thinks this song sucks. Matt thinks it's a beautifully written song.
Weetabix : really? did he say that? I love QT
Pie : not in so many words...I was reading between the lines
Weetabix : I always believed that he and Margaret Cho really truly belong together
I don't know who QT is dating/married to now. I hope it's Uma Thurman's feet.
Pie : "Matt" is making dumb faces and enjoys this song more than anyone else on earth, including Bryan Adams and Michael Bolton.
and I bet he wishes he was married to Uma Thurman's feet.
Weetabix : I am trying to supress this song as it is unfolding, I loath is so much.
Also, his voice is shaky and weird.
Pie : me too. let's talk about something else! anything!
so, my toenail polish is navy blue.
Weetabix : The Captain has given up and gone to bed. I've stayed up too late for his taste.
Oooh! Fancy!
Pie : I have new dry erase markers.
Weetabix : Mine is a salmon, and in dire need of a polish.
Are they juicy?
it is over. I will vote him off with my time machine.
Weetabix : I see Paula is politely clapping.
Pie : Randy says it was "interesting"
that it started off cool, but then was "pitchy"
and he said you "can't do all of that stuff" with a simple song
and the audience isn't even booing
Pie : Kara didn't lke it either
but she is saying more words than necessary to get that across, as usual
and clearly he CAN suck with that song.
okay, I have no more buffer left
Weetabix : I would prefer "Matt" be gone over Anoop, quite honestly
Pie : so now I am watching the commercials
me too, Anoop is improving, and "Matt" is boring me
Weetabix : especially since while technically, "Matt" probably has a better voice or at least gives a better performance, at least Anoop doesn't bore the hell out of me

"Endless Love" from the movie Endless Love

Pie : Danny is dressed like Miami Vice
Weetabix : the entire show? Including the vice lords and the pimps?
Pie : QT mentoring Danny, who is singing another boring ass ballad, "Endless Love"
yes, and the speedboat and the palm trees
Weetabix : what's up with the ballads!!
Pie : he is dressed like all of it
Weetabix : so, I was really hoping Titanic would make an appearance in this show
and also, Mamma Mia
Pie : QT is saying if he doesn't move his fingers and toes, the power will come out of his eyes. oh, QT, you are kind of crazy.
Weetabix : just because I love me some Abba
Pie : Adam should have done My Heart Will Go On
Weetabix : ha! I love QT.
Pie : there needs to be an Abba night, but I am not convinced Abba would co-sign that.
Weetabix : and "Matt" should have done a number out of "From Justin To Kelly"
Pie : I like the harp. I actually like this song, as far as ballads go.
but it's a duet... so.... um....
Weetabix : I'm not sure what to make of that prolonged arty shot of Danny through the harp strings? Are they saying that Danny is going to be put in jail?
This is a hard song to do in Karaoke Revolution
Pie : yeah because it's not clear which key you're supposed to be singing in
Weetabix : and the answer, as we have found, is c) neither. Sing somewhere in the middle.
Pie : Danny is singing this passionately! I think it's pretty good, and "Matt" is in trouble.
more symbolic harp strings.
Weetabix : it's definitely better than "Matt", whom I would like to see go if only so that I didn't have to keep typing quotation marks all the time.
Pie : Paula wasn't sure that the key should have been lowered, but midway through, she felt the magic.
sparkle sparkle
Weetabix : oh, I was feeling a little magic. Maybe some Lucky Charms-worth of magic
Pie : Simon said he can't fault him for the way he sang it, but was disappointed by the traditional version of the song, and the harp, as opposed to Cookie's "Hello" which was a Lionel Richie song that Cookie did something with and made it his own

"Falling Slowly" from Once

Weetabix : well, that's a good point. Cookie's "Hello" was for me the highlight of that season (although his song from Phantom of the Opera was also up there)
Pie : except I have commercials first
Weetabix : paused on disembodied hand playing a guitar
Pie : I loved his "Billie Jean" also, but yeah. "Hello" was great, and I love that song anyway.
Weetabix : right now, I'm thinking that Adam was the top, followed by Danny. I disliked "Matt" and I suspect Allison may also be in trouble
we have Lil and Kris to go, though
Pie : I am betting on Matt to be gone. but we'll see how Kris and Ley-ull do.
okay back from commercials
I am so happy about Kris's song choice!
"Falling Slowly" from Once which is A PHENOMENAL MOVIE.
Weetabix : I don't think I know this movie or song
what is Once about? When did it come out?
Pie : this song won an Oscar last year
Weetabix : I have apparently been living under a rock.
Pie : it's Irish. about Irish songwriters. and it's fantastic.
and the song won an Oscar! and I am now paused on a guitar.
Weetabix : lovely! I'll add it to my Netflix queue
Pie : you definitely should. everyone should. it is lovely.
Weetabix : oh! I've heard this song before!
Pie : Ian declares "he should stop smiling"
well sure! it won an Oscar!
I enjoy how they have the background singer harmonizing
Weetabix : I didn't watch the Oscars... I never do, except for one year when Kymm's mom was going to be on it.
this song is LOVELY
I love it
Pie : watch the movie! watch the movie! it's so great as a duet.
Weetabix : It's actually swaying my opinion about Castrochuleta
Pie : I want to vote for him just for picking that song.
Weetabix : I think I downloaded the song, perhaps, but it might be on my Not!Mac
that was really lovely
Pie : Randy did not like it. fuck off, Randy.
Weetabix : I'm not sure if America will like it but I absolutely loved that.
his eyebrows didn't even bother me
Pie : Randy thought it was pitchy even though he lovs the song.
Kara called it an "obscure" song but a great moment.
just because it wasn't some shitty Bryan Adams song.
hey, this show is going fast! LEY-ULL ROUNDS is next.
I hope Kris is safe, just for the principle of the thin.

"The Rose" from The Rose

Pie : okay, Lil is being mentored as she sings "The Rose"
and she is going to "take it more gospel" for QT, who enjoys Ley-ull.
Weetabix : I wonder if the entire audience will just get up and leave?
Pie : QT says she "does not need a bait and switch"
Weetabix : we should probably explain that joke
Pie : we should explain that joke.
ha! jinx!
go ahead, explain!
Weetabix : heee!
ok, the first night that you, I, Fu and Jake hung out together in San Francisco (without a purpose, like Journalcon), we went to The Mint, which is still my favorite karaoke place in the world
and it was getting late and then two women got up to sing a song, and then on the screen "The Rose" popped up
Pie : Ian is laughing at the melissima. this is the best she's sounded in weeks, to me.
Weetabix : and without saying anything, we all just got up, as one unit, and walked out of the bar
Pie : hee. "The Rose"... that was funny.
Weetabix : so that moment, back at the Mint, we had a rare group telepathy situation. It was beautiful.
Pie : if I recall, we got to the sidewalk outside the karaoke bar and then cracked up. it really was.
Weetabix : That is my favorite sidewalk in the entire city. Magical things happen there. It was the moment that the menage a'quatre was born!
Pie : and now I am listening to this twice.
it's like the opposite of that moment.
Weetabix : This is very good
Pie : it is! I agree!
yay Ley-ull!
Weetabix : with the exception that the two ladies at The Mint were really truly awful and this was lovely
what do the judges have to say?
Pie : Paula loves the song, which is by "Amanda McBroom"
and "the road is long, but worthwhile taking"
Simon is confused by Paula but thinks Lil is getting it wrong, it was too "soft" and "middle of the road"
"you are not the artist I believe we met seven or eight weeks ago... I am getting frustrated."
Lil is now saying she put her gospel twist on the song and tried to make it her own
Weetabix : huh
Pie : she is defending herself eloquently
Weetabix : I totally got the gospel thing
Pie : I thought it was easily the best she's done in a long time, and I don't know what Simon wants from her if that wasn't it, you know?


and I am sticking with my "Matt" prediction, which I made before I even heard "Matt" sing.
Weetabix : I think that's a sound one, but I think Allison may be in trouble
Pie : I think if Allison gets voted off, they'll save her.
Weetabix : I'm checking Dial Idol and right now, it's too close to call
Castrochuleta and "Matt" are on the bottom, but everyone is within the margin of error
Allison is third
from the bottom
Danny and Lil are on top
Pie : Castrochuleta CANNOT GET VOTED OFF
Weetabix : not for that song. It was really lovely.
Pie : exactly. otherwise people will pick shitty songs for every movies night! and not be daring!
Weetabix : totally! They'll pick stupid Bryan Adams songs every time!
The world cannot handle that.
What have you done America?
Pie : do not do this, America! reward the lovely and awesome song from Once!
Weetabix : Please, America!

Weetapidol out!

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Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Vegas odds for who will win American Idol

I always consult the Vegas odds for American Idol when I make my pool picks (which I believe screwed me over the first year of Weetapidol. Stupid Daughtry!) but we've got a revised breakout of odds from I'm always fascinated by using statistics to predict the future, so I'm sharing it with you.

Odds to win American Idol 2009

Adam Lambert -235

Danny Gokey +280

Lil Rounds +1600

Matt Giraud +1600

Allison Iraheta +1000

Anoop Desai +3500

Kris Allen +1200

Translation: if you bet a dollar on Allison and she won, you'd get $1000, but if you were betting $500 on Adam winning, and he won, you'd win two bucks and some change. I'm thinking that in Vegas, that's called "a sure thing".

What will you do, America? What WILL you DO!?!?

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Thursday, April 09, 2009

Top 8: Messrs Roper and Furley... and a Time Machine

[Note: Weetabix did not have the first 37 minutes of the show taped, hence Pie’s over-describing what’s going on during said 37 minutes. And…we take you to our program, already in progress.]

Pie: So Ryan is being melodramatic as usual
and saying THIS is aMERICAN Idol. so not shocking, so far.
now are credits where they try to include as little of Taylor Hicks as humanly possible.
someone who looks like the corpse of Billy Corgan is sitting in the audience, staring ahead corpse-like, as the people around him clap.
theme is "songs from the year you were born"
so they are going to show contestant baby photos, and now they are introducing the judges with THEIR baby photos
Weetabix: this is going to make us feel really really fucking old
Pie: the judges are already seated, by the way
baby Randy has a little bow tie
baby Kara looks annoyed
Weetabix: people were probably already making Ione Skye comparisons
Pie: Ryan said she looks like she "just made a poopie"
Weetabix: if I were watching that, I would laugh, because all poop is funny
Pie: Paula has a ponytail and Simon is holding a toy gun
Weetabix: the word "poop" is fun
Pie: that is why I typed it for you, baby... although I do not find poop humorous
now they are going to show Ryan, who has tiny buck teeth
Paula is mocking him for looking like a bunny
Weetabix: considering how small Ryan is now, as a child, he must have been microscopic
Pie: he was wee, I am sure
what is up with that pissed off Billy Corgan guy? very weird.
Weetabix: he's now dating Tia Tequila
so maybe that's why he's pissed? Because it underlines what a sellout he is
Pie: yeah I saw that on Go Fug Yourself
Weetabix: I did too!
Pie: I remain confused by that coupling
Weetabix: It's sad that we get our major news breaks from Jessica and Heather

"Stand By Me"

Weetabix: so, I'm feeling much more kind toward Mr. Gokey now
because I found out that he's a Milwaukee boy
Pie: this song is a snoozer, though, Milwaukee boy or not
Weetabix: so far, yes, it does seem so
it's hard to make this your own, especially since it's from the 60's
Pie: this song is from 1980?
Weetabix: it was maybe a hit in 1980? or something?
Pie: weren't any fun 80s songs out yet? we just watched Top 100 One-Hit Wonders of the 80s, and it was full of awesome songs.
Weetabix: I hope, for your sake, that no one does Red Red Wine
I already have bronchitis, I do not want to add UB40itis.
I will vote them off immediately.
Weetabix: will you vote them off with your TIME MACHINE?!
Pie: hee! yes. with my time machine that can vote people off this show.
Weetabix: please note that they had some mild Chris light action
Pie: noted.
Weetabix: what do the judges have to say?
Pie: Randy did not love the arrangement but loves some things about Danny
he called it a "vocal talent show"
Kara agrees, and is wearing the night sky
a midnight blue dress with sparkles
Weetabix: lovely!
Pie: Paula says "wow" and she likes the arrangement, and the bar is set high
Weetabix: high for Paula? Who is very short? that might only be 3 feet.
Pie: hee!
Simon said the beginning was good, the middle was lazy, the end was terrific, so overall great
Weetabix: I must tell you, reader, that I'm watching Mopie on video and she did not hee.
Pie: I did in fact hee
Weetabix: Now she did hee
Pie: every time I laugh I cough
Weetabix: awww.... poor Pie
Pie: so my laughter is on the inside… AS ARE MY TEARS
Weetabix: drink more cough syrup. Pretend that it is wine.

"All She Wants To Do Is Dance"

Pie: okay there is a Ryan Raps, with Castrochuleta
Weetabix: no fair, Castrochuleta doesn't deserve a Ryan Raps… DOES NOT DESERVE
I have unnecessary ire for Castrochuleta. I don't know why that is.
Pie: he is telling a story of how he got recognized by a fan who said "can you tell Adam I said hi?"
Weetabix: ha! see, that's charming.
Pie: he was born in 1985
Weetabix: I'm too hard on the boy
Pie: come on, man! FUN 80s SONG!
Weetabix: 1985? and with that, I hate him again
Pie: Castrochuleta wanted to be a taxidriver when he grew up
Weetabix: my little brother wanted to be a landlord
Pie: hee, this is funny. he wanted to be a taxi driver because he thought they traveled a lot, and then realized "they only travel in one city"
a landlord?
Weetabix: he had painter paints, which were his landlord pants, and he expected to carry around a hammer
Pie: hee!
Weetabix: yes, I don't know what his spectrum of reference was.
Pie: Mr. Roper and/or Furley.
Weetabix: well, and his dad. I think that was a lot of it.

Weetabix: I'm not sure how I feel about this song.
Pie: the problem with Castrochuleta is that his mouth goes lopsided when he sings...
this song is kind of crizzappy
Weetabix: I really really liked the Don Henley version, weirdly enough.
Pie: I mean I get that he's going for "groovy"
I think his voice is average
Weetabix: I didn't like Don Henley, though, as an artist until I saw him in person, opening for Sting at a Rainforest benefit concert
Pie: and then you liked him?
Weetabix: (I'm telling this anecdote because that performance was really subpar)
yeah, it turned out that he was actually quite delightful in concert and totally changed my mind about him as a performer

Pie: Kara is happy he picked an uptempo song for a change, but it felt "like jazz funk homework"
Weetabix: that's clever, Ione!
Pie: Paula thinks his "quiet faith is heartfelt" or something like that
she finds him likeable
so, faint praise
Weetabix: there are lots of likeable people that I don't want to hear singing
Pie: Simon says it was likeable but indulgent, boring, and forgettable.
he came across as a guitarist who wanted to sing, rather than a singer, and it was a "stupid song choice"
Weetabix: when it comes down to it, I haven't liked 80% of Castrochuleta's performance. And like Don Henley, I have nothing against him personally. Unlike Don Henley, he hasn't changed my opinion about him.
Pie: Randy agrees with Simon and says the arrangement overpowered him
Weetabix: Agreed, he seemed to be trying to keep up with it, rather than drive it.
Pie: yeah. I agree too. I like his spiky little hair though. he's like a sweet bland little musical kitten.

"What's Love Got To Do With It?"

Weetabix: doing TINA TURNER!!!! hells yes
Pie: her mom is saying Lil is her given name
they are pronouncing it "Lee-yull"
both Lil and her mom with their little southern accents. their lee-yull accents.
Weetabix: How can three letters have two syllables?
Pie: “Ian” does.
Weetabix: well, I can't really say anything... Wisconsinites give the word "No" two syllables too
Pie: yes for Tina!
Weetabix: I love that she's kind of trying to do the Tina Turner strut!
I love this song beyond reason
Pie: she has breath problems, though
Weetabix: I'm not sure about Lil's wig tonight… better than last week's though
Pie: yeah, but her voice is shaky
Weetabix: she does have weird breathing issues! Maybe she also has bronchitis
Pie: "what's love got to do wid' it?" hee.
she's just not as good as she should be on this song.
Weetabix: Agreed
Pie: she should be knocking this one out of the park
Weetabix: that note was really not good
and she's shouting, not singing
the "broken" at the end was indeed broken
Pie: yeah... wow, I really want her to be better.

Pie: Paula says she looks hot… so we all know where that's going
Weetabix: drink!
Pie: she thought it was important for Lil to prove herself as an artist, but she thinks she hasn't done it
Weetabix: that's pretty accurate, at least after that performance
Pie: although she said she is a "great vocalist" which I am thinking isn't even true
Simon says "we are not looking for a second or third rate Tina Turner, which is what that was"
Weetabix: oooh, sick burn
Pie: "ghastly copycat performance"
Simon is telling her she needs to show originality and not be karaoke
Randy says he loves her and she's "mad talented" but the other two are right
Kara is now saying superfluous things
Wait, Kara is saying her lower range suffers and she has to work on her lower range... wait, that was useful! I take it back.
Weetabix: that's actually more useful than Paula
Pie: Lil is saying she is going to show everyone her artistry next time, blah blah
Pie: I hope she does; I like her

“True Colors”

Weetabix: Aaaaanooooop!
Pie: Ryan Raps with Anoop
Anoop is dressed like a candy striper
Weetabix: and OFF COMES THE MOPIE BRA!!!
Anoop was born in 1986, same day as David Cook
Weetabix: interesting! and yet, they are so very different
Pie: "True Colors"… interesting choice!
Weetabix: oh, I love this song!!!
is this the one that we used to sing all the time on Karaoke Revolution?
Pie: I don't think so
Weetabix: No, that was "All Through The Night"
Pie: yes, that was it
Weetabix: well, and Kiss Me
Pie: this is pleasant, but in a Karaoke Revolution sort of way
come on over, Anoop. we'll break out the PS2 and sing the shit out of "Pieces of Me"
Weetabix: heee!
(Note per video, I did actually HEE)
I liked the softer part in the beginning, but then he sped it up and it got less special
Pie: this is a nice performance... it is not thrilling me or anything, but I like it.
Weetabix: but wow, loved the falsetto, actually
Pie: so far my favorite of the night
I did enjoy the falsetto
Weetabix: that's an easy call, yes

Pie: Randy said he pulled it back and it was impressive… "you can actually sing!"
Weetabix: One would hope, Randy… although Megan Joy couldn't sing and look how far she got
Pie: Kara admired his control of the song
Paula loved the song choice and phrasing… Paula: "you did show your true colors, just like a rainbow! fantastic!" Simon: "or a waterfall"
Weetabix: ha!
Pie: Simon liked it too, because he took it and made it his own
Weetabix: interesting! Go Anoop!
Pie: he liked that he took a girl's song and sang it, because that's a shorthand way to make it your own
Weetabix: I've often wondered about that
Pie: I am paraphrasing, but yeah…
Weetabix: because at first when you said Castrochuleta was singing "All She Wants To Do Is Dance", I misread it and thought he was singing Whitney's "I Wanna Dance With Somebody"
and I thought "Whoa, brave choice!"
Pie: and Simon says it's okay for Anoop to be snotty to the judges because it's a two way street "we can be horrible to you, and you can be horrible back"
Weetabix: and yay, with that, I should have the rest on my TiFaux

"The Search Is Over"?

Pie: also born in 1985, and wanted to be a train engineer
Weetabix: Have you noticed that Scott has fangs?
Pie: I have not
Weetabix: Look, when he made the spooky laugh, you could see them
Pie: but I see them now!
Weetabix: it's very Butch Patrick
Pie: yes! spooky laugh!
Weetabix: maybe that's why America doesn't like my blind boy. America is afraid that he's going to bite them and suck their blood.
Pie: "The Search Is Over"? is this a song?
Weetabix: yeah, it was Asia, maybe? I hated it.
"What you see is real"... what do YOU see, Scott?
Pie: aaaand here we go with the jokes…
Weetabix: If only he were wearing pink pants
Pie: he is holding a guitar and not playing it as of yet
"I can see forever"? "I look into your eyes"? wouldn't you want to vet these lyrics? if you were... blind?
Weetabix: heee!
Whoa, falsetto interestingness
Pie: I don't think I like this song, but the performance is different from him, and thus cool
Weetabix: love was right before my EYES!!!!
Pie: Well, he does have eyes.

Pie: Kara is like "you are a brave little toaster!"
Weetabix: Kara wants to see him back at the piano? I don't get it. Weren't they bitching about this a few weeks ago? She thought it was over-ambitious! interesting.
Pie: Paula is giving him credit for losing the piano… Paula is also talking to him in the "brave little toaster" voice.
"you were screeching... but GO YOU!"
Weetabix: Paula's got lipstick on her teeth
or maybe it's the drugs… are 'ludes pink?
Pie: Simon thinks the song choice was horrible
that's a good question... I do not know… Paula has a little pink straw in her Coke cup
Weetabix: well, the guitar playing wasn't great, but Castrochuleta's not that great with the guitar either. Pie: I like Paula like I like my straws: CRAZY!
Weetabix: maybe it's a flavostraw?
Pie: maybe it is a straw carved out of 'ludes

"I Can't Make You Love Me"

Weetabix: Allison was born in 1992... jesus now we are old
I want to die
I was living on my own by then!!!
oh my god, her school picture is ADORABLE
Pie: she is cute, that Allison
Weetabix: I love this song, and also, it's hard… I can't sing it
Pie: srsly? I was just going to request it from you next time we karaoke!
Weetabix: seriously. I sound like the Little Mermaid. You need a kind of gravelly voice to carry it off.
Pie: hee!
Weetabix: Plus, I think it's in a weird key or something. Or it has too many notes. I just sound sharp or flat. I'm not good enough for that song.
Pie: Allison definitely can't make me love that skirt
Weetabix: No, the skirt is all shades of wrong. But I do love her reliance upon many chest chains to offset the skirt.
Pie: she's doing a nice vocal on this song.
Weetabix: it works well with her voice… her little young voice.
Pie: I like little Allison.
Weetabix: I do too. I think America does as well. Even though she's chosen a horrible skirt.

Weetabix: Look at Paula's teeth!!! The two that aren't the front teeth? The eye teeth? They are pink.
Pie: Paula thinks she's "undeniably Allison"... hee. I have missed Paula telling the contestants their own names.
Weetabix: Simon thought it was "very good"
Pie: Simon thinks her personality is not coming across
Weetabix: and thinks she needs to be more likeable
Pie: Randy is comparing her to La Clarkson!
Weetabix: oh, I can totally see that!
Pie: me too!
Weetabix: she is a Mini Clarkson!
Pie: I was just listening to her new album in the car, and watched her SNL thing last night… I love La Clarkson.
Weetabix: I love her too. I love her single so much.
Pie: definitely Allison has a Kelly vibe. I can see it!

"Part Time Lover"

Weetabix: Matt was also born in 1985! This is making me feel seriously decrepit. I'm in the middle of helping to plan my 20 year reunion for my high school class of 1989.
Pie: he is acting in some little angel play
Weetabix: I remember this song!
Pie: are you kidding me with this song choice?
where's "Pass the Dutchie," people? "Der Kommisar"? "Relax"?
Weetabix: Um, “Careless Whisper” much?
Pie: I have no idea if these were in 1985
FINGER GUNS!!!!!!!!!!!!
Weetabix: drink!
Pie: my best friend and I wrote a parody of Careless Whisper called Careless Whiskers. it was about love between walruses and seals.
Weetabix: I remember you telling me about that!
I'm not sure how I feel about the Marshall Wedding hat
Pie: hee. good call on the Marshall wedding hat.
Weetabix: Ok, his falsetto is going to be the death of me.
Pie: yeah that was mediocre
Weetabix: I don't remember all of this falsetto-ness in the 80's. Was I blinded by all the neon?

Pie: Randy again with "one of the best" of the night
Weetabix: Ione Skye is slavering
Pie: I think Kara is on drugs, with her standing ovation
and "well done" from Simon... what?
Weetabix: Jesus, am I on drugs? I thought it was meh.
Pie: maybe they all drank out of the pink drug straw
Weetabix: is this the false positive of the week? Where they try to make a voting populace relax into thinking that their fav is safe, and then they get voted off?

“Mad World”

Pie: I think my TiVo cut off Adam
Weetabix: oh nooooes!
Pie: I have a backup
Weetabix: 1982! Finally!
Pie: hee. "sports, not so much"
Weetabix: Love that his dad just basically said that "Yeah, Adam's gay."
Pie: yeah. I mean I think America is aware! and yet he might win!
Weetabix: I think he's playing it close to the vest, which is probably a good idea
Pie: he screwed up the lyrics
Weetabix: oh I remember this song. I don't know that I would have chosen this one.
Pie: I'm pretty sure it isn't "going nowhere with the daily races"
Weetabix: sometimes the daily races don't go anywhere. They go in a circle.
Pie: I assume this is the Gary Jules version... I love this version.
oh, nice falsetto on "nervous"
Weetabix: this is totally contemporary, quite honestly
it doesn't have the stench of "80's night" that other performances did
Pie: this is fanfuckingtastic.
Weetabix: oh, that rise was amazing
Pie: yeah it was.
Weetabix: Paula's loving it
Pie: he is sooooo gooooood.
Weetabix: Seriously, this is too good for American Idol
Pie: no kidding.
Weetabix: he's outclassing this show
he just sang my pug to sleep
Pie: even Simon looks happy.

Pie: standing O from Simon!
Weetabix: I don't think that's ever happened before
why did the show go so grossly overtime? All of those stupid Ryan Raps
it's like they were purposely trying to tank Adam
Pie: I can't recall it ever happening.
Weetabix: I mean, both of our Tivo's ran out and cut off his performance
Pie: I think the show went over
Weetabix: how many other people didn't see him perform?
I blame the Ryan Raps
Pie: me too

Pie: okay, predictions?
I mean if Adam got voted out due to that, the judges would 100% use the save
Weetabix: Well, I would think so… that's nice, the save safety net
Pie: Dial Idol said he was safe though… the only one this week, even
Weetabix: ok, I'm not spoiled were you?
Pie: no
Weetabix: predictions?
Pie: I think one of the Scott/Matt/Castrochuleta trifecta is leaving
Weetabix: One would hope
Pie: oh, or Danny, who I forgot about
Weetabix: I think Danny is safe this week
I'd have to say Castrochuleta or Scott. Meh, maybe Lil, but she's one of two chicks left, so I think she's going to be safe for awhile
Pie: yeah I think so too
Weetabix: ok, shall we look?
Pie: and Anoop was good
yes! go find! seek and find!

Weetabix: bottom three were Anoop, Scott and Lil
with 34 million votes in, only 30,000 separated the bottom two (who were Scott and Anoop)
in the distance, Ian does laundry, unaware of the drama
Pie: wow!
Weetabix: and the ousted contestant is.... Scott
Pie: well that's not a shocker
Weetabix: no, really not. He had a good ride. And ended on a song about seeing and eyes.
Pie: heh. and the judges did not save him, I take it?
Weetabix: It was 2 for and 2 against
they apparently huddled and then decided no
Pie: wow… Paula and Kara were the 2 for, obvs.
I am going to bet on that
Weetabix: That's probably a safe bet.
All in all, I'll bet that Simon can break a tie
Pie: well that sounds about right. and with that… Weetapidol out!

Top 8: Pool Results!

And Scott is out in eighth place! The Weetapidol Hive Mind had him in sixth, and our guesses this week are all over the place.

Only one person correctly predicted Scott leaving eighth, our own Kelly s., who gets 13 points for the week. In second place for this week with 12 points each were Gila, TeKay, and Julie, all of whom put Scott in seventh place. (Anyone who put him ninth would also have gotten 12 points; but nobody did.) The big losers for the week were me and Weet, who thought he was going all the way to fourth and third, respectively.

Wendy, who put Scott in fifth, manages to hang on to her lead; but there's a big surge into second place, and some shakeups in the standings...

69 points: Wendi
67 points: Weetapidol Hive Mind, Aine, Kim
66 points: Mo Pie, Shari H.
65 points: Martha. Eden, TeKay, Kelly S., Martha
63 points: Jeremy
62 points: Gila
58 points: Shmuel
40 points: Weet
35 points: Julie

Next week, the Hive Mind wants "Matt" to go. We'll see how we do!

Thursday, April 02, 2009

Top 9: Pool Results!

America finally put Megan out of our misery, and I hear she continued the theme of "be snotty to the judges" week in the process! Let's see how you all did this week...

People who correctly placed Megan in 9th place thisw week were Weet, Shari, and TeKay, and each gets 13 points. A lot of other people were close, having her at 8th or 10th, and they get 12 points each: Mo Pie, Aine, Wendi, Kim, Jeremy, Julie, and the Weetapidol Hive Mind. Nobody predicted her going higher than 7th, so no huge changes in the rankings this week, and Wendi still hangs on to the lead!

59 points: Wendi
57 points: Mo Pie
56 points: Aine, Kim, Weetapidol Hive Mind, Shari H.
55 points: Martha
54 points: Eden
53 points: TeKay
52 points: Kelly S., Jeremy
50 points: Gila
48 points: Shmuel
32 points: Weet
23 points: Julie

Next week, the Hive Mind thinks it's Anoop's turn to go. Will the Hive Mind score a bullseye? Stay tuned!

Wednesday, April 01, 2009

Top 9: Reader, I Lol'd.

Weetabix: There is pressure! Ryan said so!
Pie: what is with Scott's Greased Lightning pompadour? why are all the kids standing as if they're in a Star Trek transporter?
Weetabix: beam me up, Seacrest!
Pie: I always enjoy how the "previous winners" montage in the center of the screen is Jordin and David Cook and Carrie. who's missing? hmmm....
Weetabix: Taylor "Want some free tickets to my concert" Hicks?
Pie: exactly!
Weetabix: By the way, I have a correction, Michael Sarver was not from Texas. He was from Oklahoma. Which is practically the same thing.
Pie: they are adjacent
Weetabix: they have a similar accent, and also, the love of musical theatre
"Oklahoma" of course, and then the lesser known but still fabulous "Best Little Whorehouse in Texas"
Pie: absolutely! "I am a whore, I am a whore, I am the best whore in Texas!"
(I do not know the lyrics.)
Weetabix: yes, those are the lyrics. About the whores.

Weetabix: And we return to the tradition of Randy's stripe shirts
Pie: Randy is dressed like a referee again, and my sexual attraction for him is gone
Weetabix: but what about his provocative lips, Pie?
Pie: no, his lips no longer provocatate me
Weetabix: hee.
Pie: Kara looks hot… she should be quiet and look hot
Weetabix: She's wearing a lot of body glitter on her decolletage
Pie: Simon wants Ryan to "be amazing." the flirting is so cute.
Weetabix: perhaps you can drink more of the wines and be provocatated later
Pie: perhaps! now can we talk about Ryan's tie clasp?
Weetabix: What are we going to say about Ryan's tie clip?
Pie: I find it slightly sexy
Weetabix: yes, it's very bankery, but without AIG badness
Pie: Allison has muppet hair!!
Weetabix: I missed it, but will look forward to it in her clip
Pie: I enjoy Ryan on his radio show. this is a true story.
Pie: I think he is better than Casey Kasem. blasphemy!
Weetabix: really? I LOOOOOVE Casey Kasem
Pie: he was a guest star on Saved by the Bell, which is a definite plus in his column
Weetabix: but I think you're right, Ryan’s probably better

Weetabix: I need some wine. I'm drinking milk, which just seems wrong
but will make sure that I don't get the oesteo porosis
Pie: you could throw some Bailey's in that shit
Weetabix: so, I opened a bottle of mildly expensive wine tonight, and poured it into a Shoddy Treatment wine glass
except that it had apparently not gotten a successful wash in the dish washer, and there was crud in it
Pie: oh dear
Weetabix: and it was a smallish bottle! so there was like half of it in there!
Pie: what is the wine? I am drinking our Alpha Omega wine club wine for the month
Weetabix: I may have to go break out some Alpha Omega too, so as to increase the verisimilitude of our former Weetapidol wine drinking nights

Weetabix: Usher?
Pie: he is singing an Usher song but Ryan did not give the title
Weetabix: What's the theme tonight, by the way? did I miss it?
Pie: it is "popular iTunes downloads"… so basically "open mic night"
Weetabix: Interesting product placement
Pie: I don't know this song, but I do not enjoy this
the Idolettes get to dance though!
Weetabix: I am loving the one Idolette's boots
Pie: I don't know if I don't like the song or don't like Anoop or what
Weetabix: I hate Usher, in all forms
Pie: "I don't know what it is," as Anoop just sang
Weetabix: it's pretty close to Usher's version
Pie: I have no feelings vis a vis Usher
it is annoying
stop singing
Weetabix: Anoop has a wallet chain, except it's around his shoulder
Pie: what does that do for you?
Weetabix: I'm not having any reaction to the shoulderified wallet chain\
Pie: it is very Michael Jackson
Weetabix: he makes a face that looks like he smelled something foul
Pie: yes he is. Anoop should not try to be sexy. I don't think it works.
however, I am pleased for him that he has such enthusiastic friends, cheering madly in the audience.
Weetabix: I think that Anoop's performance will be popular with the kids these days, as is Usher
Pie: Referee Randy did not think it was the right song
Weetabix: Referee Randy has called a foul on the song choice
we are weirdly in sync again with our chatting! it's kind of eerie
Pie: I just LOLed.
Weetabix: isn't that a drinking game? when we do the jinx chat?
Pie: you won, though, because you said "called a foul"
Weetabix: ha!
Pie: I am drinking, lady. I am doing the drinking!
Weetabix: I agree with you on Ione Skye. She's looking very pretty tonight
Pie: she did not enjoy the song
Weetabix: Paula's hair went droooop
Pie: Paula seems extra-stoned
Weetabix: I do not enjoy Paula's necklace tonight… it appears as though she crafted it from the Target toy aisle
Pie: Paula is saying things that might mean something but does not mean anything to me
Weetabix: Simon thinks it was a mess
Pie: Simon Says it was a mess! thank you, Simon.
Weetabix: and I'm sad to say that I can't view his nipples tonight
Pie: "a wannabe"--yes.
Weetabix: It did kind of give me a headache too
Pie: you have an obsession with Simon's nipples. I respect that.
Weetabix: I approve of the fact that his nipples always seem very ready for action
Pie: Anoop is being kind of snotty. Anoop, your snottyness does not become you.
he also disregarded the actual criticism, which was to be original.
Weetabix: Anoop, dearheart, I really hope that the world is ready for a R&B artist with Indian ethnicity, but at this point... hun, I just don't see it
Pie: I think the Indianness is not the issue, it is the Anoopness.
I now want to see a hip-hop band made up of Kal Penn, Aasif Mandvi, and Dev Patel. I want this band immediately.
it will prove that the world is ready! and Anoop will not be in it.

Pie: okay... did they just say Megan was doing Bob Marley?
Weetabix: yes, that is what they said
Pie: I feel like she just threw a dart at a board labeled ALL THE MUSIC.
Weetabix: I need wine before this happens
Pie: yes you do.
Weetabix: Tom Collichio is on my commercial and they took a slam at Alinea!!! but it's a commercial for Diet Coke!
Pie: I know! fuck you, Collichio.
Weetabix: Is it weird that I am starting to find Collichio kind of quietly hot?
he was on the Today show this morning and I actually watched it, just to watch him make paninis
Pie: no, he's kind of hot!
Weetabix: that bald head
Pie: he can grill my panini anytime
Weetabix: I do have a thing for baldies
Weetabix: yes, Daughtry. EXACTLY… it wasn't just the wallet chain!
Pie: so my friend Rebecka's boyfriend Kevin is going to be on TV on Thursday.. he is in Jason Castro's band
Weetabix: oh my gosh, really!?
Pie: everyone watch! I think it's some Idol special or something
Weetabix: also, Vin Diesel. I'm weirdly hot for him too.
Pie: heh
Weetabix: Mentioned only because there was just a commercial for Fast & Furious, which I thought was a reissue of the original, but apparently is not

"Turn Your Lights Down Low"

Weetabix: Oh dear god
Pie: she is irritating, but pretty
Weetabix: actually, this might be ok, though. It might translate well to her wiggedy wack voice
Agreed, she is really pretty
Pie: she still looks super awkward
Weetabix: I just don't understand how she got into the Top Anything on Idol
Pie: I'm sorry but I HATE HER VOICE… I am done with her
Weetabix: you know, it's almost Norah Jones-ish, but gone very very wrong
Pie: maybe... it's definitely gone very wrong.
Weetabix: It's almost like the Idol producers are playing a joke on one of those bad audition people, but she just doesn't realize it
Pie: like, fine, pretty hippy, go sing in Cafe Gratitude and get off my TV
Weetabix: I don't think I've heard the Lauren Hill version of this song. I'm probably glad, because I would hate this more than I already do.
Pie: I can't stand to watch her because of how scared she looks all the time
Weetabix: and WHAT is she doing with her hand? Seriously, it's like Lindsay's evil hand from Angel
Pie: Kara agrees she's in trouble. thanks, Kara.
and now Kara is going to keeeeep taaaalkingggggg.
Kara found her irritating! YES! ME TOO! Kara, we are one, suddenly.
Weetabix: I hope Paula says she's pretty
drink if she says that she's pretty!
Pie: "your one long poseur braid is pretty"
Weetabix: oh "that's where beauty develops" is not the same
Pie: she's like Natalie Merchant gone wrong
Weetabix: damn, I totally thought Paula would go for pretty or fashion
Pie: Simon says it's monotonous
Weetabix: "nobody's going to like that song" which is totally accurate
Pie: I completely agree
hahaha Randy just made me laugh… "it took forever, and I love that song"
Weetabix: Referee Randy compared it to watching paint dry
Pie: and good point from Randy: you can love a song but it doesn't mean it's the right one for you to sing
now she's being snotty
"the audience was feeling it"
the audience is a blob of NO TASTE.
Weetabix: is this snotty contestant week? I hate that week.
Pie: hee! that is the theme
I thought it was "throw a dart at the history of music" but it is in fact "be snotty to the judges"

Weetabix: also, does she think that she can compensate for her lack of talent by wearing more necklaces?
because she cannot.

"What Hurts The Most"

Pie: I just realized Danny Gokey looks like Seth Rogan's little brother in a weird way
Weetabix: I don't see it
Pie: it was in fast forward… it was a fleeting moment
Weetabix: I think he looks a bit like Rufus Sewell's younger brother, though
Pie: mmm, Rufus Sewell.
sorry, were you saying something?
Weetabix: yeah, there's some yummy action
plus, he does mean so so so well… more than the guy who plays Lucius Malfoy
Pie: I want to take off my bra. this means I'm drunk, right?
Weetabix: yes… or slutty. take it off!!!
Pie: well both of those are true
Weetabix: and there it goes, Weetapidolers… wish you had the web cam action
Pie: there is a violin lady… this is pretty
Weetabix: Danny is singing Rascal Flatts, which is country, always a detriment for me
but so far I'm not irritated
Pie: this song sounds slightly familiar… I don’t hate it
Weetabix: it does sound familiar... perhaps it was in a movie or something
Pie: he isn't quite nailing the chorus
Weetabix: I like his glasses
Pie: me too
Weetabix: I like boys in glasses
Pie: me too! I wish Een would wear his more.
Weetabix: I wish the Captain would want to wear quirky Weezer frames
also, in the summer, the Captain has Danny Gokey's facial hair situation, which I enjoy a great deal, obvs
Pie: obvs.

Pie: okay that was boring and mediocre, I feel…. someone needs to sing something half decent. Adam!? ADAM?!?
Weetabix: yeah, I wasn't amazed by that song
Pie: Paula liked it.... in her car. in her car?
Weetabix: did she say something about the cajuns? were there cajuns in the song?
Pie: I have no idea about the cajuns.
Simon's flat hair liked it. are we crazy? maybe it was better live.
Weetabix: but did his nipples? We'll never know.
Pie: The Referee is wearing his friendship necklace again
Weetabix: Wow, Randy just dismissed Anoop and Megan by saying that tonight's show starts with Danny
Pie: um, I do not disagree
Weetabix: double negatives and freedom boobs are leaving me confused
Pie: my freedom boobs, or Kara's?
Weetabix: your freedom boobs, of course. Way better than Kara's.
Ione had goosebumps... she will not say where
Pie: that was overpraised, because it came right after Megan, who made me wish she would electrocute herself with the microphone.
I mean, not fatally.
Weetabix: I think you've nailed it, though. Had Danny come after, say, Lil or Adam, he might not have gotten stroked so much.

"Don't Speak"

Weetabix: ooh, she's doing No Doubt! that might be good!
Pie: hey! a song I like!
Weetabix: wow, that's some hair on Allison
Pie: she has got SOME MUPPET HAIR.
Weetabix: hells yes she does
Pie: yes!
Weetabix: the lighting people are not being kind to little Miss Allison
Pie: her skirt is adorable and her voice sounds awesome.
Weetabix: wow, she totally fucked up the words
why is she holding that guitar? She's not playing it
Pie: she's kind of trying too hard on the chorus
the background vocals are overpowering her a little bit, too
Weetabix: Agreed. It's not so much a screaming song.
Pie: a stripped down version would have been nicer.
Weetabix: the unplugged Don't Speak
Pie: I liked the quiet beginning more than the screamy middle.
Weetabix: I do like her outfit. Randy has no room to talk, man.
Pie: Referee Randy is throwing a penalty flag but I like her outfit.
Weetabix: ha!
Pie: Kara talks = bored now
Weetabix: Paula called Allison's guitar "her axe"
Pie: heee. she sure did. oh Paula.
Weetabix: Allison is very cute. She's not that great, but I kind of feel the need to protect her.
Pie: Paula likes the outfit because Paula owns that outfit.
Weetabix: hee!
Pie: she'll be in it next week.
Weetabix: one can only hope
Pie: Allison is not being snotty.
Weetabix: I don't think we're ever in danger of her being snotty. She seems legitimately sweet.

"Just The Way You Are"

Weetabix: Scott keeps killing me with his song choices
Pie: this is... not... current. this is old-timey.
Weetabix: wait, the judges criticized him with the piano, so this week, it's just going to be him and the piano
Pie: yeah.... and old-timeyness.
Weetabix: but with a leather jacket
Pie: and his Greased Lightning pompadour, which I had forgotten about since the opening credits
Weetabix: Dear Hair and Makeup People: I do not approve of the taming and otherwise swooshing up of Blind Guy's hair
He doesn't know! Don't do those things to him!
Pie: oh my god, Scott, THIS IS SO DATED.
Weetabix: seriously, I think you were a fetus when this came out
Pie: there is absolutely zero relevance here.
Weetabix: Seriously, who is downloading this from iTunes?
Pie: I like Scott, but dear god.
Weetabix: besides my in-laws?
Pie: my grandfather. WHO IS DEAD.
Weetabix: is he wearing a shirt under that jacket? because he shouldn't be
Pie: Greased lightnin, go greased lightnin.
Weetabix: I'll bet Adam would not wear a shirt under the leather jacket.
Pie: look in a mirror, Scott! oh wait...

Weetabix: Oh I lol'd!
Pie: reader, I lol'd.

Weetabix: Kara likes the song choice!
Pie: Kara liked it? oh-kay....
Paula is proud... oh-kay....
Weetabix: I think I just love how clean-cut Scott is. I want to... God help me... corrupt him.
Pie: Paula has forgotten about "his challenge"
that is condescending, Paula
far better to make tacky jokes
Weetabix: besides, we don't know. He might have super awesome senses and at night, fight crime with a very highly specialized cane.
Pie: hee!
even Simon liked it! am I here right now!?
Weetabix: I don't get it. I like Scott, but I didn't like this at all. Maybe if he weren't wearing a shirt, it would have been better.
Pie: The Ref says he's "one of the best of the night"
we are on person 5
again, meaningless
Weetabix: and he said that many times
Pie: wow, that bored me to the point of blindness
Weetabix: totally, the only other "one" was Danny's anemic love song

“You Found Me”
Weetabix: Ryan Raps with Matt
Pie: another leather jacket
Weetabix: speaking of Daredevil, it's Bullseye!!
Pie: hey, he's doing something "current!"
Weetabix: I do like the Fray
Pie: by the Fray
Weetabix: it sounds like he's off key, and that he started maybe too early
Pie: I like this song. I think it's just the song I am really enjoying.
Weetabix: I don't like how he is attempting to make it his own
Pie: the people surrounding him seem to be clapping at random
Weetabix: they were told to clap by the audience fluffer
Pie: were they told to clap at random intervals?
Weetabix: the one guy who looks like Phillip Seymour Hoffman seems to be trying purposely to keep the audience off the clap
Pie: seriously, the clapping is excruciating
I enjoyed that!
I don't know the original, though.
Weetabix: the song is better than "Matt"s
Pie: did Paula just call him "Matt"nificent?
Weetabix: agreed with Paula that it sounded a little too close to the original
Pie: I liked this so much better than Scott's early bird special
I am not on the same page as the judges at the mo
Weetabix: well, it was a song from this millennium
Pie: Ryan has a lot of spray tan happening this week
he is verging on oompa loompa
Weetabix: he does seem unnaturally George Hamilton right now

"I Surrender"

Pie: don't let me down, Lil.
Weetabix: god, please let it be Celine
I don't know of a Celine song called Surrender
Pie: does Celine have a song named Surrender? yes! it's called "I Surrender"
she looks pretty, but about forty.
Weetabix: I was hoping for something amazing. Like "I Drove All Night" or at very least the Titanic song
do we know how old Lil is?
I don't think the dress is good for her.
Pie: she kind of looks like Marla Gibbs if Marla Gibbs was a body builder.
Weetabix: she's got some broader shoulders that would benefit from not being in a strapless (or one strap) dress
Pie: Lil had to take a breath in the middle of that note
she might not be as good as I thought she was
she's no J. Hud, I'm sorry to say.
Weetabix: No, definitely agreed on that.
Pie: I like her sparkly eyes
also, that dress is not flattering to the ass situation.
Weetabix: do not like the blue eyeshadow, however, but that's just a thing with me
no, the entire dress was kind of a nightmare
Pie: I like the sparkle eyes
Weetabix: that's easy to do, though… I have some powder that does that, you put it over any eyeshadow
Pie: I want sparkle powder please.
wrong song choice again. I agree with the judges.
Weetabix: Adam will save us
Pie: is it commercial time yet? wine time? I NEED MORE WINE TO COMBAT THE BOREDOM.
Weetabix: who is left at this point? Castrochuleta and Adam? maybe?
Pie: and sparkle powder.
Weetabix: and another Matt?
Pie: Castrochuleta.... Adam... probably there are at least three more white dudes we're forgetting.
they are cutting to the tiny littler rounds! oh those poor small children!
Weetabix: that is just unfair
Pie: they are terrified, Ryan!
Weetabix: and also, does Randy have kids? did we know that?
Pie: okay Lil looks gorgeous from the neck up... I think I just hate the dress.
I don't think he does
Weetabix: Randy said he was ready for a grandchild, which might be insulting if Randy doesn't have kids

“Play That Funky Music”

Weetabix: THANK GOD!!!
Pie: I officially love Adam
Weetabix: Play that funky music!?!
Pie: Adam could sing anything. I am INTO IT.
Weetabix: seriously, he could do The Rose and I would not get up and exit
Pie: lol!
or "ril" because in my head was "reader, I lol'd."
Weetabix: Paula's dancing!
Pie: Adam, I love you. ADAM I LOVE YOU.
Weetabix: yes that was amazingly awesome and magically delicious
Pie: Adam must win. fuck the demographic theory.
Weetabix: Well, his demographic is "gay white guy", so that's sort of different, right?
I mean, Clay didn't actually win
Pie: true! thank you for the rationalization.
Weetabix: if he played the gay card, at the right moment, that might ensure the win
Pie: I can't see how anyone could beat him, honestly.
Weetabix: I keep typing "wine" instead of "win"
Pie: Allison could be in the finale with him but it would be a blowout.
what an ending
Weetabix: I would have never dreamed that Chris Daughtry would have faltered and Taylor Hicks would have taken it home
Pie: good point. but where's the soul patrol here? nowhere.
Mick Jagger, Steven Tyler, and Adam Lambert? that is weird, Paula.
it's more like David Bowie... and... um.... Adam Lambert.
neither Mick nor Steven is as versatile as Adam.
loooooOOoooOOoooOOoooOOooove Adam.
Weetabix: I like that Paula compared him to Steven Tyler, but he's really almost more Jim Morrison and yes... David Bowie
and he gave love to Ricky Minor!
Pie: now he's giving a shoutout to the band! oh, Adam!
Weetabix: Oh, I love this boy!
Kara is such a fucking dork.
Pie: I am honestly going to watch that again as soon as we are done here.
Castrochuleta is next.
Weetabix: do we have to keep watching and ruin my Adam buzz with Castrochuleta?

"Ain't No Sunshine"
Weetabix: Mandisa is in the audience
Pie: I love this song
Weetabix: didn't someone sing this before? am I misremembering?
Pie: Kris wants to make a moment. well, this is a good song.
I don't know.
Weetabix: he's got a cellist out there, which is interesting
Pie: oh, this is pretty. I do like this.
Weetabix: it's hard to judge after Adam, quite frankly
it's like switching from cocaine to pot
I assume, anyway
Pie: hee. I have done that.
Weetabix: and how does it go?
Pie: I don't remember, I was really high.

Pie: I would download this! I love it!
Weetabix: I'm not going to remember this either, but I'm the pessimistic half of Weetapidol
there's a lot of exhaling into the microphone
Pie: he just panted into the microphone. bad form, Castrochuleta.
Weetabix: and by the way, there was a camera shot straight up his nostrils
Pie: I have hated everything up until the last two performances.
Weetabix: agreed, I haven't been excited about anything
Pie: the jugdes like it... I like it!

Pie: predictions?
Weetabix: You know, I know the idea is that the producers are having the performance order random, but I think they are trying to tank Adam by not putting him in the pimp spot, and putting Castrochuleta there
Pie: they are definitely not trying to tank Adam… they are saving the pimp spot until he needs it
they know Adam is the best thing they have
Weetabix: they can dole out the pimp spot as they require it
Pie: I want to predict Scott will go.
Weetabix: I think Megan
Pie: Anoop is another possibility, he sucked
Weetabix: I think the song choice is going to save Anoop
Pie: Megan sucks horribly, I hope you're right and she goes
Weetabix: I don't remember who I picked for this week. I think "Matt"
Pie: I could see "Matt" going… I think definitely safe are Allison, Adam, and Kris.
I will stick with Scott as going.
what does Dial Idol say?
Weetabix: Dial Idol thinks Megan is going, but Allison, Anoop, "Matt", Scott and Lil are all in danger
Pie: if Allison or Lil loses, they will use the save
Megan going would be the right call
although dear god there are a lot of white dudes
Weetabix: I don't know, I think they'll save the save for Danny or Adam… they seem to be the blessed two