Crazy Cool Medallions
P: "Three girls and one guy..." and Blake is making a douchey face.
W: And the sky is blue.
P: Ryan can't say "Three black and one white…"
W: Hee. Once again, though, the demographic theory holds.
P: No, it has fallen. It has failed.
W: No, I think you're right about Blake being in the final two. And the opposites theory that we talked about before would be in play. White/black, boy/girl, talented/untalented….
P: Hee. Yay, the BeeGees!
W: Are we going to be dancing? Simultaneously? Throughout the nation?
P: Yes.
W: Again, I ask you: what happened to Abba night?
P: It remains a beautiful dream.
W: I'm holding out for season seven. Oh, I have that LP! Which, for younger readers, is what happened before CDs.
P: I can't think about the BeeGees without thinking about "The Barry Gibb Talk Show" on SNL.
W: That made me love Jimmy Fallon and Justin Timberlake.
P: There's the cut to the old BeeGee. That's not Jimmy Fallon!
W: No.
BeeGee: It was a joy to have three women to judge from, as well as Blake.
That sounds like a slam for some reason.
P: Is that Barry Gibb?
W: I don't know. But I think he has dementia.
(Melinda, "Love You Inside And Out")
P: He's surprised she picked a falsetto song? Aren't all their songs falsetto?
W: I don't even know what they sound like not falsetto.
P: I know.
W: I'm not sure if I like the black shirt and dark jeans combo.
P: I say yes. I like the pirate sleeves.
W: This is the Jordin's earrings? Already?
P: I guess so.
W: She just had a huge spit!
P: I was gonna say!
W: It was like a tiny parachute jumping out of her mouth. That was exciting.
P: It was Dunkelman.
W: That's a really good juxtaposition. Last time this season, we have McBeaver. Last season, we just got a big wad of spit,. That was our exciting rewind moment this year.
P: When you put it that way, it sounds really tragic. And yet it's a good final four.
W: Well…
P: I meant "it's a good final four… as well as Blake."
W: Did Paula like it or not?
P: Did Randy even talk?
W: I was busy looking at the design on his shirt. It looks like he sweated through it in an artistic manner.
P: Simon is wearing his Hanes Her Way shirt.
W: I enjoy his Hanes shirts. Because I can usually spot a Simon nipple.
P: Wow. You have problems.
W: I enjoy his nipples. I enjoy the man's nipples. Leave me to his nipples. I don't like a lot of nipples. I think we've discussed that, haven't we? Pepperoni nipples?
P: I'm just going to let you keep talking.
(Blake, "You Should Be Dancing")
P: This was in The Office. Neil danced to it.
W: Was it?
P: This is why I wanted to hear "More Than A Woman." Because of The Office.
W: You have problems.
P: Alright, Simon nipple.
W: Hey, I dreamed of making out with Michael Scott. I have problems. But I kind of like his jacket.
P: His frosted tips are back. Those are "cool guy tips," and you will know what I mean when you watch How I Met Your Mother. Okay, I gleefully hate this performance, even though I like this song.
W: Yes. Even though I enjoy the blazer. What is he doing?
P: He's beatboxing.
W: Of course he is.
P: The final two would be boring without him, you have to admit.
W: It would, but I don't know why America is not collectively embarrassed by this kid. That's my problem. I feel chagrin. On a weekly basis.
P: I don't have enough wine in my glass to deal with Blake.
W: Drink more.
P: Oh! There's a current Blind Item that Paula pooped her pants on muscle relaxants.
W: Wow. I have never been that relaxed.
P: I saved that story to tell you, because it had poop in it.
(LaKisha "Stayin' Alive")
P: Oh, "it's a high falsetto song," is it, Barry Gibb?
W: Yay LaKisha. And I love her outfit.
P: That is an awesome outfit.
W: Her bangs are getting a little out of line there.
P: Why isn't she doing the high voice?
W: I don't know. Maybe she's trying to make it her own. And prove that she's an old soul.
P: Did she just change the words to "I'm a dancing sistah"?
W: Yes.
P: Awesome. But this isn't my favorite vocal for me, dawg.
W: I like how she's doing the alternating beat for the aah-aah-aahs.
P: The judges didn't like it.
W: Maybe you have to be a BeeGee?
P: It wasn't the best LaKisha. I hope she does better on her second song. I love that shirt though. It's a great pattern.
W: I know, it's so cute.
P: She looks a little shell-shocked.
(Jordin, "To Love Somebody")
P: Oh, dress over jeans! Love it. And this is a pretty song.
W: Who really sings this?
P: He just said it was a man. I don't know.
W: I'm not crazy about the dress, but I like it over jeans. I like the shoes.
P; CLAY SANG THIS! Sorry to exclaim that in your ear.
W: Yeah, that was a little exuberant. You're such a Claymate.
P: Sorry, she's no Clay.
W: The lights are really boring. They kind of match her dress though. Who knew that the BeeGees wrote this?
P: Not I. We need to embed Clay's version in this entry.
W: So if you were on American Idol and were faced with BeeGees week, what would they be?
P: I don't know enough BeeGees to answer that.
W: They wrote a lot of songs for other people, though. Like Barbra Streisand. And… old people.
P: They really are praising the hell out of her.
W: They sure are. It seems unnecessary.
P: This is exactly what the Grassy Knoll predicted.
(commercials)
(Melinda, "How Do You Mend A Broken Heart")
P: I like Melinda's gray necklace.
W: I like her dress. At least from the sitting…
P: Vantage point?
W: I was going to say venue, but that's better. I'm drunk.
P: Oh, the bottom of that dress is weird.
W: It looks a little like a sack.
P: This is like a boring, old lady song.
W: It should be played on some little jukebox that takes dimes.
P: Hee.
W: Who knew the Gibbs were so prolific? God I wish Jimmy Fallon and Justin Timberlake would come out right now. That would be awesome.
P: That would be beyond awesome.
W: That would be better than Chris Kattan doing Constantine.
P: She just threw in a glory note. Hopefully that'll save her.
W: Eeh. It was really boring. I was playing with the cat.
P: Melinda looks pretty. Wow, I just sounded like Paula.
W: You did.
(Blake, "This Is Where I Came In")
P: I'm getting tired of Barry Gibb being surprised by everyone's choices
W: I've never heard this song. Oh good! He's gonna beatbox! Color me surprised. Color me Melinda.
P: Goody. Weetapidol readers, this is Exhibit A of Why We Hate Blake.
W: Explain to me why he's wearing half of a sweater vest. What's with the Blake lights?
P: I feel like I'm 10 years too old to appreciate anything about Blake.
W: Maybe we're like Menudo. We've aged out of Blake. Once we had our periods.
P: Hee.
W: The interesting thing about Blake is that he always picks songs that don't require much vocal ability.
P: I think he has vocal ability though.
W: Maybe he does. But he's lazy. And he can't do the dorky white guy dancing if he's going to do glory notes.
P: I still think he's going to make an interesting finalist. Note how I'm resigned to it.
W: Oh yeah, I swallowed that pill a while ago. That bitter, bitter pill.
P: Translation of what Randy said: "Stop fucking beatboxing." And Paula is totally slurring. And Simon's trying to stick a fork in Blake.
W: Yep. He's throwing Blake to the fire.
P: To the wolves?
W: To the wolves that are on fire.
P: That tie does not go with that ¾ of a sweater vest.
W: I don't know what's going on with that sweater vest, but it's pissing me right the fuck off.
P: It's Exhibit B.
(commercials)
(LaKisha, "Run To Me")
P: Judge Judy! Okay, what is the point of that.
W: And Judge Judy's mom? It got away from Ryan there for a sec.
P: Now Barry Gibb is surprised again.
W: He's Melinda Gibb.
P: LaKisha has such a beautiful voice. And now we've got the emo guitar. And the fabulous dress.
W: Ooh, Jordin's earrings. I don't like the green middle thing.
P: I love that!
W: It's doing the optical illusion thing to make her look thinner.
P: So you're saying it's like that T-shirt with the bikini on it.
W: YES.
P: I like it anyway.
W: That is your prerogative. This is a better song. You know what I would like to hear them say? "You know what we said about Melinda? Forget that! She's out of there!"
P: I don't like LaKisha's earrings. I like her voice though. And her bikini T-shirt dress.
W: Hee. And ouch. What happened to her voice there? I think she lost her breath there.
P: Why does Randy keep saying "joint"?
W: Like a Spike Lee joint. It's his attempt at being urban.
P: Now this is LaKisha going home. Everybody's lukewarm.
W: You think in a lukewarm state, it has to be LaKisha going home?
P: I think so.
W: That would be a very very sad lukewarm state.
P: Maybe I can save her for another week by predicting her demise.
W: I will stick with saying no! No, she won't go! Melinda can go.
(commercials)
(Jordin, "Woman In Love")
P: Jordin does have a nice voice.
W: No, this is a great song. It's perfect for her, I think.
P: Wither they paid off Barry Gibb, or Jordin is going to win.
W: I like her dress.
P: It looks too much like a prom dress.
W: You know, it does looks like a prom dress. Maybe it's the dress her grandmother bought her.
P: See, it wouldn't be terrible if Jordin won. I would vote for her over Blake.
W: You're falling right into their trap! Who the heck would vote for her over Blake? Blake. They want another Kelly Clarkson, that's all.
P: I hope she outgrows her crazy right wing-ness.
W: I've heard it from numerous sources.
P: I hear Carrie Underwood's a total bitch, anyway. So it's probably too late. Wow, the judges didn't like Jordin?
W: Wow. And she's doing the finger thing. That bugs me.
(recap)
P: So, who do you think is going?
W: I am sucking ass on the pool. I am saying Jordin. I have been wrong this entire season, so I will stick with that. I will say Jordin.
P: But you picked the pool at the beginning of the season… so….
W: What, if I were voting my conscience? Melinda or Blake. Hey, who is Vote for the Worst picking?
P: LaKisha. They've given up. If anyone, they should be backing Blake.
W: Totally.
P: I once again really think LaKisha is going.
W: If you're wrong… who do you think?
P: I could see Melinda being the shocking boot.
W: We haven't really had a shocking boot, have we?
P: No. And I think Blake should go… but we'll see I guess.
W: We will. That is what we will do.
Weetapidol out.
W: And the sky is blue.
P: Ryan can't say "Three black and one white…"
W: Hee. Once again, though, the demographic theory holds.
P: No, it has fallen. It has failed.
W: No, I think you're right about Blake being in the final two. And the opposites theory that we talked about before would be in play. White/black, boy/girl, talented/untalented….
P: Hee. Yay, the BeeGees!
W: Are we going to be dancing? Simultaneously? Throughout the nation?
P: Yes.
W: Again, I ask you: what happened to Abba night?
P: It remains a beautiful dream.
W: I'm holding out for season seven. Oh, I have that LP! Which, for younger readers, is what happened before CDs.
P: I can't think about the BeeGees without thinking about "The Barry Gibb Talk Show" on SNL.
W: That made me love Jimmy Fallon and Justin Timberlake.
P: There's the cut to the old BeeGee. That's not Jimmy Fallon!
W: No.
BeeGee: It was a joy to have three women to judge from, as well as Blake.
That sounds like a slam for some reason.
P: Is that Barry Gibb?
W: I don't know. But I think he has dementia.
(Melinda, "Love You Inside And Out")
P: He's surprised she picked a falsetto song? Aren't all their songs falsetto?
W: I don't even know what they sound like not falsetto.
P: I know.
W: I'm not sure if I like the black shirt and dark jeans combo.
P: I say yes. I like the pirate sleeves.
W: This is the Jordin's earrings? Already?
P: I guess so.
W: She just had a huge spit!
P: I was gonna say!
W: It was like a tiny parachute jumping out of her mouth. That was exciting.
P: It was Dunkelman.
W: That's a really good juxtaposition. Last time this season, we have McBeaver. Last season, we just got a big wad of spit,. That was our exciting rewind moment this year.
P: When you put it that way, it sounds really tragic. And yet it's a good final four.
W: Well…
P: I meant "it's a good final four… as well as Blake."
W: Did Paula like it or not?
P: Did Randy even talk?
W: I was busy looking at the design on his shirt. It looks like he sweated through it in an artistic manner.
P: Simon is wearing his Hanes Her Way shirt.
W: I enjoy his Hanes shirts. Because I can usually spot a Simon nipple.
P: Wow. You have problems.
W: I enjoy his nipples. I enjoy the man's nipples. Leave me to his nipples. I don't like a lot of nipples. I think we've discussed that, haven't we? Pepperoni nipples?
P: I'm just going to let you keep talking.
(Blake, "You Should Be Dancing")
P: This was in The Office. Neil danced to it.
W: Was it?
P: This is why I wanted to hear "More Than A Woman." Because of The Office.
W: You have problems.
P: Alright, Simon nipple.
W: Hey, I dreamed of making out with Michael Scott. I have problems. But I kind of like his jacket.
P: His frosted tips are back. Those are "cool guy tips," and you will know what I mean when you watch How I Met Your Mother. Okay, I gleefully hate this performance, even though I like this song.
W: Yes. Even though I enjoy the blazer. What is he doing?
P: He's beatboxing.
W: Of course he is.
P: The final two would be boring without him, you have to admit.
W: It would, but I don't know why America is not collectively embarrassed by this kid. That's my problem. I feel chagrin. On a weekly basis.
P: I don't have enough wine in my glass to deal with Blake.
W: Drink more.
P: Oh! There's a current Blind Item that Paula pooped her pants on muscle relaxants.
W: Wow. I have never been that relaxed.
P: I saved that story to tell you, because it had poop in it.
(LaKisha "Stayin' Alive")
P: Oh, "it's a high falsetto song," is it, Barry Gibb?
W: Yay LaKisha. And I love her outfit.
P: That is an awesome outfit.
W: Her bangs are getting a little out of line there.
P: Why isn't she doing the high voice?
W: I don't know. Maybe she's trying to make it her own. And prove that she's an old soul.
P: Did she just change the words to "I'm a dancing sistah"?
W: Yes.
P: Awesome. But this isn't my favorite vocal for me, dawg.
W: I like how she's doing the alternating beat for the aah-aah-aahs.
P: The judges didn't like it.
W: Maybe you have to be a BeeGee?
P: It wasn't the best LaKisha. I hope she does better on her second song. I love that shirt though. It's a great pattern.
W: I know, it's so cute.
P: She looks a little shell-shocked.
(Jordin, "To Love Somebody")
P: Oh, dress over jeans! Love it. And this is a pretty song.
W: Who really sings this?
P: He just said it was a man. I don't know.
W: I'm not crazy about the dress, but I like it over jeans. I like the shoes.
P; CLAY SANG THIS! Sorry to exclaim that in your ear.
W: Yeah, that was a little exuberant. You're such a Claymate.
P: Sorry, she's no Clay.
W: The lights are really boring. They kind of match her dress though. Who knew that the BeeGees wrote this?
P: Not I. We need to embed Clay's version in this entry.
W: So if you were on American Idol and were faced with BeeGees week, what would they be?
P: I don't know enough BeeGees to answer that.
W: They wrote a lot of songs for other people, though. Like Barbra Streisand. And… old people.
P: They really are praising the hell out of her.
W: They sure are. It seems unnecessary.
P: This is exactly what the Grassy Knoll predicted.
(commercials)
(Melinda, "How Do You Mend A Broken Heart")
P: I like Melinda's gray necklace.
W: I like her dress. At least from the sitting…
P: Vantage point?
W: I was going to say venue, but that's better. I'm drunk.
P: Oh, the bottom of that dress is weird.
W: It looks a little like a sack.
P: This is like a boring, old lady song.
W: It should be played on some little jukebox that takes dimes.
P: Hee.
W: Who knew the Gibbs were so prolific? God I wish Jimmy Fallon and Justin Timberlake would come out right now. That would be awesome.
P: That would be beyond awesome.
W: That would be better than Chris Kattan doing Constantine.
P: She just threw in a glory note. Hopefully that'll save her.
W: Eeh. It was really boring. I was playing with the cat.
P: Melinda looks pretty. Wow, I just sounded like Paula.
W: You did.
(Blake, "This Is Where I Came In")
P: I'm getting tired of Barry Gibb being surprised by everyone's choices
W: I've never heard this song. Oh good! He's gonna beatbox! Color me surprised. Color me Melinda.
P: Goody. Weetapidol readers, this is Exhibit A of Why We Hate Blake.
W: Explain to me why he's wearing half of a sweater vest. What's with the Blake lights?
P: I feel like I'm 10 years too old to appreciate anything about Blake.
W: Maybe we're like Menudo. We've aged out of Blake. Once we had our periods.
P: Hee.
W: The interesting thing about Blake is that he always picks songs that don't require much vocal ability.
P: I think he has vocal ability though.
W: Maybe he does. But he's lazy. And he can't do the dorky white guy dancing if he's going to do glory notes.
P: I still think he's going to make an interesting finalist. Note how I'm resigned to it.
W: Oh yeah, I swallowed that pill a while ago. That bitter, bitter pill.
P: Translation of what Randy said: "Stop fucking beatboxing." And Paula is totally slurring. And Simon's trying to stick a fork in Blake.
W: Yep. He's throwing Blake to the fire.
P: To the wolves?
W: To the wolves that are on fire.
P: That tie does not go with that ¾ of a sweater vest.
W: I don't know what's going on with that sweater vest, but it's pissing me right the fuck off.
P: It's Exhibit B.
(commercials)
(LaKisha, "Run To Me")
P: Judge Judy! Okay, what is the point of that.
W: And Judge Judy's mom? It got away from Ryan there for a sec.
P: Now Barry Gibb is surprised again.
W: He's Melinda Gibb.
P: LaKisha has such a beautiful voice. And now we've got the emo guitar. And the fabulous dress.
W: Ooh, Jordin's earrings. I don't like the green middle thing.
P: I love that!
W: It's doing the optical illusion thing to make her look thinner.
P: So you're saying it's like that T-shirt with the bikini on it.
W: YES.
P: I like it anyway.
W: That is your prerogative. This is a better song. You know what I would like to hear them say? "You know what we said about Melinda? Forget that! She's out of there!"
P: I don't like LaKisha's earrings. I like her voice though. And her bikini T-shirt dress.
W: Hee. And ouch. What happened to her voice there? I think she lost her breath there.
P: Why does Randy keep saying "joint"?
W: Like a Spike Lee joint. It's his attempt at being urban.
P: Now this is LaKisha going home. Everybody's lukewarm.
W: You think in a lukewarm state, it has to be LaKisha going home?
P: I think so.
W: That would be a very very sad lukewarm state.
P: Maybe I can save her for another week by predicting her demise.
W: I will stick with saying no! No, she won't go! Melinda can go.
(commercials)
(Jordin, "Woman In Love")
P: Jordin does have a nice voice.
W: No, this is a great song. It's perfect for her, I think.
P: Wither they paid off Barry Gibb, or Jordin is going to win.
W: I like her dress.
P: It looks too much like a prom dress.
W: You know, it does looks like a prom dress. Maybe it's the dress her grandmother bought her.
P: See, it wouldn't be terrible if Jordin won. I would vote for her over Blake.
W: You're falling right into their trap! Who the heck would vote for her over Blake? Blake. They want another Kelly Clarkson, that's all.
P: I hope she outgrows her crazy right wing-ness.
W: I've heard it from numerous sources.
P: I hear Carrie Underwood's a total bitch, anyway. So it's probably too late. Wow, the judges didn't like Jordin?
W: Wow. And she's doing the finger thing. That bugs me.
(recap)
P: So, who do you think is going?
W: I am sucking ass on the pool. I am saying Jordin. I have been wrong this entire season, so I will stick with that. I will say Jordin.
P: But you picked the pool at the beginning of the season… so….
W: What, if I were voting my conscience? Melinda or Blake. Hey, who is Vote for the Worst picking?
P: LaKisha. They've given up. If anyone, they should be backing Blake.
W: Totally.
P: I once again really think LaKisha is going.
W: If you're wrong… who do you think?
P: I could see Melinda being the shocking boot.
W: We haven't really had a shocking boot, have we?
P: No. And I think Blake should go… but we'll see I guess.
W: We will. That is what we will do.
Weetapidol out.
posted by mo pie at 9:06 PM
1 Comments:
The beatboxing was totally except for one vocal break, where it was kind of cool. But Randy complaining? Let's rewind a few weeks, where he scolded Blake for not beatboxing on every song.
I squealed for Barry. But it was not a good night and, in the future, AI should just stay away from the Bee Gees. And Elvis.
Also, I still have post-traumatic flashbacks to Bucky singing Buddy Holly's "Oh Boy!"
Post a Comment
<< Home